Children & Grief – How To Help Your Child When Someone Dies

When someone special passes away, kids feel sad in different ways. How they deal with their sadness depends on things like their age, how much they loved the person, and the help they get from others.
 
What parents can do to help their child:
 
 

1.Talk Simply About Death:

Use easy words when you tell your child about someone’s death. Say something like, “I have sad news. Grandma died today.” Then wait a bit to let them think about it.

2.Listen and Hug:

Each child reacts differently to the news. Some might cry, some might ask questions, and some might not show much emotion. That’s all okay. Just be there to hug them, answer their questions, or just spend time quietly together. It’s fine if they see you’re sad too.

 

3.Share Feelings:

Encourage your child to talk about what they’re feeling and thinking. You can share your feelings too, like, “We’re both very sad because we loved Grandma a lot, and she loved us too.”
 

 4.Prepare Them for Changes:

If things will be different now, like someone else picking them up from school, tell them about it. This helps them know what to expect.

 

5.Explain Funeral Events:

 

Let them know what happens at viewings, funerals, or memorials. Tell them there will be people who also loved the person, and they might see crying or hugging. Explain what burial or cremation means in simple terms.

6.Give Them a Role:

Let your child do something small to help, like reading a poem, choosing a song, or bringing photos. Let them decide if and how they want to participate.

7.Remember the Loved One Together:

 
Draw pictures or write stories about the person who died. Talking about the person and sharing happy memories is good.
 

8.Give Comfort and Time:

 
If your child is sad or worried, talk about it and listen. Let them know it’s okay to take time to feel better. Join in activities they enjoy to help them feel a bit happier.
 

9.Be Patient with Healing:

 
Healing takes time. Keep talking and listening to your child. Remembering the person with love is part of healing.
 

10.Seek Extra Help if Needed:

 
If the death was sudden or very upsetting, or if your child is very distressed for a long time, talk to a doctor. They can help you find a therapist if needed.

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